Want to be your best non-stressed self this Purim? Here are some of our favorite tips to help set you up for a successful day.
Purim is almost here! The costumes are ready, mishloach manos are almost prepared, and the list is getting checked off. So why do you still have a sinking feeling when you think about Purim around the corner? If Purim day is what leaves you with a giant headache, we’ve got you! We compiled a list of tips for pre, during, and post-Purim to help you best navigate this super-exciting (and dare we say, super-stressful) day.
Most important thing to remember? The key to a successful, no-stress Purim day is NO EXPECTATIONS. Don’t have any. None. Purim is the most-fun day of the year… for kids. Don’t expect the perfect day with perfect costumes and well-behaved children and calm moments. Expect Purim in all its beautiful chaos, and enjoy the day for what it is.
Here are some tips to set you up for success!
Before Purim:
- Prepare each kids’ costume (with all the accessories) in a bag before Purim. No more panicked, ‘Where’s my ________?!’ on the way out the door, it’s all ready.
- Are you into Purim pictures? Take them the Sunday before! Purim day is so busy, don’t expect to get that perfect picture then.
- Get your car Purim-friendly by putting a garbage bag and a box in the car. Bags are being shredded and snacks are everywhere: have a (nice-size) garbage bag at the ready and a box ready to take it all in from the car. Make tomorrow easier for yourself!
- Is the candy stress what gets you? Read this post for some tips and tricks on how to implement a balanced approach for your family.
On Purim:
- Eat breakfast! This one is a biggie: for the kids and for you. The day is going to be a sugary mess, start their day (and yours!) with a healthy, filling breakfast. If you’re busy from the moment the day starts, try something you can prep in advance, like overnight oats.
- Hear Megillah as early as you can. Purim day starts off busy, yes, but it only gets busier as the day goes on.
- Those people that you absolutely cannot forget to visit or give mishloach manos to? This tip is right on theme. Go early! Those are the first 5-10 people you visit, right after your Megillah and healthy breakfast.
- Remember that you have no expectations. Yup, this one bears repeating. This day isn’t about you. You got this!
Post-Purim:
- Leftover mishloach manos: the team was pretty divided on this one! Some choose to buy their kids candy off them (read more about that here!), some put it into the Shabbos nosh bin and that’s that, and some just let their kids separate into piles and trade to their heart’s content! Decide what you’re going to do and speak about it with the kids before Purim so you’re all on the same page before the sugar-high sets in.
I’m sure you have tips and tricks that you’ve adopted to help you best navigate Purim, share them below!
Wow awesome thx! Please ask your kids if there’s anyone in their grade who isn’t going to get a lot of shalach manos and add them to your list. You have no idea the impact this will have on that child- your daughter or son can literally make their entire Purim.
Beautiful Ayelet! I have also tried to go over or meet a single friend to brighten up her day. My kids remember that visit for years. Breakfast is a must. Buy the breads/rolls/bagels the day before and make tuna in advance. It’s so worth it!!
Lunch bears mentioning too! I try to cut up a veggie platter before Purim and just keep it out all day. If it’s there, it will usually get munched on when we’re home
Don’t forget to visit great aunts, cousins that will be super touched. That’s what counts most!
If you have multiple kids going around at the same time, and each child is possesive over his or her nosh, give each of them a SEPARATE box in the car so as soon as it comes in, it goes in that kid’s box…
I have always found that in addition to us, adults, having expectations for Purim day, our kids have their own expectations, too! And while we, as adults, need to work on letting go, we also need to proactively manage our children’s expectations, too. The more you discuss, negotiate and arrange before Purim, the fewer disappointment-fueled meltdowns that can wreak havoc on the day!
Discuss with your kids: how many friends you will take them to visit, which neighborhoods you will and will not travel to, how long they will be in the car, how many “obligatory” visits (relatives, rav, etc), a rough schedule for the day, etc. Best to under-promise and over-deliver!
My son had a physical therapist many years ago that made a huge impact on his life. She and her husband aren’t part of the mainstream orthodox community in town. We make sure every year to go giver mishloach manos every year! It is completely out of the way but it really shows my kids the value of hakaras hatov.
Our Purim tradition is to take an egg box, close both sides and cut through the middle with a knife so we get two “trays” that’s how we take the MM to and from the car, better than having to bend into a deep egg box… it can go on seat/trunk or floor and everything stays in there instead of flying around all over…
I’d love to hear what others do with a child that’s allergic to lots of the things they get in their mm. Buy off only that child’s mm? Or trade with other things?
Wow that’s hard. Maybe buy in advance special treats they can eat and do a swap once they get the shalach monos. Happy Purim!