Summer brings change, and transitions aren’t always easy. This simple tip can prepare your child to be happy no matter where summer–and life–takes him.
Summer is filled with so much that children love. There are camp trips, swimming, late bedtimes, special activities, and a welcome break from the school-year routine. Many children thrive on the excitement and novelty that summer brings.
But summer is also a season of change.
For children who are naturally more anxious or who prefer predictability, all of that change can feel overwhelming. New schedules, different staff, unfamiliar peers, shifting routines, and unexpected surprises can leave them feeling unsettled.
The good news? Summer also provides a wonderful opportunity to help children build flexibility in real time. While we can’t eliminate every change, we can prepare children for it and give them tools to navigate it successfully.
Summer Is an Exception to Every Rule; Except One
Bedtimes shift. Meal times shift. Carpools change. Some children are in camp, some are home, and some seem to spend half the day in a bathing suit.
In many ways, summer is an exception to every rule.
Except one.
Children still thrive on predictability.
That doesn’t mean they need rigid schedules or every minute planned. But they do benefit from knowing:
- What to expect
- What’s expected of them
- What happens next
When those pieces are in place, children are often better equipped to handle the inevitable surprises that summer brings.
Same, But Different
One of my favorite ways to approach summer is with a simple mindset shift: Same, but Different.
I’ve used this model with my own children as well as during parent consultations.
Let’s use this strategy for a second grade boy who’s attending a “big camp” for the first time, with new peers.
What’s staying the same?
Identify which routines and expectations will remain consistent. This may include some classmates, similar morning and lunch schedules, similar rules.
What’s different?
There are many differences, but we’ll focus on basic differences such as counselor vs. Rebbe/teacher, camp vs. school rules, and varied activities which focus on sports and swim.
Helping children see both sides of the picture can make change feel much less intimidating.
Here is a sample Venn diagram that can be used as a visual for the above scenario.
Preparing Children for Transitions & Changes
One of the easiest ways to help children navigate summer is to prepare them for transitions before they happen.
A simple preview can go a long way:
“After breakfast I’m walking you to camp. After camp we’ll come home, have supper, and then head to night swim.” (bungalow colony setting)
Visual schedules can also be helpful, especially for younger children or for children who become anxious when a new setting feels uncertain.
Another strategy is to give advance notice before transitions.
Instead of saying, “Swimming ends this minute” try:
“Five more minutes in the pool, then we’re heading out”. (A timer can be helpful)
Or:
“Because tomorrow is Erev Tisha B’Av, there’s a half day, which is like a Friday schedule.”
Children often do better when they have time to mentally prepare for what’s coming next.
You can also create small routines around recurring summer activities.
“Every day we hang out our bathing suits on the back porch after we’re changed.”
Familiar routines create anchors, even when the larger schedule changes from day to day.
Modeling Flexibility
Lastly, when plans change, try modeling flexibility out loud.
A cheerful singsong voice can work wonders:
“Looks like we’re changing plans! We thought we were spending Sunday with our Cohen cousins at the farm, but instead we’re going boating with our Stern cousins.”
Children learn flexibility by watching us practice it.
So while summer may be an exception to many of the usual rules, it can also be an opportunity to strengthen adaptability, build confidence through change, and create wonderful memories along the way. After all, the goal isn’t to eliminate every surprise; it’s to help our children feel prepared enough to enjoy the adventure.
|