Just how do they manage it all?
From practical tips to getting things done faster, to mental tips to simply be able to cope with the workload…moms of large families have lots to do and they have no choice but to figure it out. We asked a few moms for their best “large family” tips. This is what they shared:
Laundry & Cleaning:
“When I fold laundry I have a laundry basket for each room spread out and I put the clothing directly into that room’s basket. That way, it takes half the time to put away and also keeps my piles folded well. I do laundry every day otherwise it piles up too quickly.”
“It’s ok if not all the laundry is done. Just keep doing.”
“I clean the house when the kids are in school and the baby is napping. I don’t have cleaning help so I need to make the most of my quiet time.”
“On Motzei Shabbos, there’s no havdalah until everyone chips in and gets the house back in order. It happens much quicker this way.”
Food:
“I have a set menu (For example: Chicken Cutlets on Monday; Chicken Bottoms on Wednesday. I’m flexible with how to season the supper). This way, I don’t need use much mental energy to decide what’s for supper.”
“My children take lunch to school. It’s bagged and frozen so they can just grab and go (rolls, garlic knots…)”
“I have a set menu. Sunday is date night, so it’s pizza or noodles for dinner. Monday is leftovers so I have all day Monday to do housework and not worry about dinner. Tuesday is dairy, Wednesday is fish, and Thursday is meat. I try to be organized about food shopping so that I don’t need to be in the grocery every day.”
Clothing:
“I don’t like too much clothing. Less stuff in the closet keeps it neater and I don’t mind if they wear it out so I have less to store as hand me down.”
Mental:
“Daven daven daven to Hashem.”
“Balance between being organized, but roll with the punches with what shows up day to day. Take a day at a time.”
“I tell my kids—fight now—because when you are married you need each other.”
“I listen to classes while I do tedious work like ironing (7 shirt every day!) so that I don’t feel like I’m drowning in housework. I feel like I’m growing spiritually and mentally.”
“Try to give each child some alone time every so often. Let them join you on errands etc. they are great at keeping track whose turn it is!”
“Sleep well. Everything seems easier when you are well rested. Nothing useful gets done after 11 pm.”
Family is growing? Adapting as you figure out how to manage it all? Share your tips below.
Listen to a short shuir daily. iTorah and Torah anytime- Daily dose are great. There is also “stories to inspire” that I listen to with my girls. Reminding ourselves daily what our purpose is and what our goal is with all these little people makes the whole day more meaningful.
On what hotline are the “Stories to Inspire” located?
Bitachon hotline 7327193898
And bnos melachim 7328068139
As a mom of a large family b”h. I wanna add one small note. Spread happiness. Some days are just not gonna work according to our plan, it’s ok!! Be positive! Speak to your kids in a light and happy atmosphere. They feed off our energy. It shows up in them now and later on in life! People like being surrounded with happy kids. Even strangers will pick up the atmosphere from home when your kids are around! Be happy! Simchas Hachayim!!
❤❤❤ Yocheved
Bitachon hotline 7327193898
And bnos melachim 7328068139
Look in the mirror every day and tell yourself that you’re a hero! You accomplish Olympic feats daily and no one in the world can be the Mommy that you are to your kids. Standing ovation to you!
I also got a second washing machine. My laundry closet has a hookup for a sink. I put a second machine there instead.
Best investment.
Get chizuk and validation about the wonderful role you have from Mothers to Mothers: women across the globe share the joys and challenges of Jewish motherhood. Based on interviews of real women plus Torah classes excerpted by category!
You can read just one page at a time; even at random. Keep it on your bedside table!
https://www.amazon.com/Julie-Hauser/e/B005128KF4%3Fref=dbs_a_mng_rwt_scns_share
We have two dishwashers and an extra large sized washer and dryer! SO helpful.
We don’t a particularly large family, but do find that set menus and cleaning up before havdalah are very helpful.
Another strategy we find helpful is doing everyone’s laundry separately. While some find it extra work, they are small loads that don’t take much time, and there’s no sorting. Kids learn from a young age to fold and put away laundry (youngest with help).
My biggest tip is skip the multitasking when possible! When you focus on one task at a time it’ll get done faster and better. And there’s nothing that’ll make you feel better than checking things off your to do list faster!! This applies to child rearing too- try to leave your to do list stashed away when the kids are home so that you can give them your undivided attention.
I find using technology helps.
I use Google spreadsheets for Yom tov menus and reuse year to year. I started binders with recipes for each Yom tov separately.
I use Google calendar for appointments. I share the ones with my husband if he needs to be involved I put notes in the Google calendar entry if there’s something to discuss. If not I get to the appointment and I don’t remember what I needed to talk about for that kid! I find appointments to be a big job I have times in the year. November is well visits. August dental checkups. Then there’s vision, dermatology and all the other stuff that come up.
I use a app for a to do list divided between To Do now, to do in the computer, errands and projects for later.
I have a running list on the computer I printed out for a shabbos menu.
I use instacart all the time and barely go shopping. I work 25 hours a week so I don’t have time for it. I have running list on Instacart that I just add to cart. For clothing and shoes I try to do as much as possible online as well.
I BH have a lot of household help and she helps with cleanup and laundry.
For a laundry system, I have baskets for each kid with their clean clothes and they are kept on shelves in the laundry room. They are put away once a week but it’s almost easier just to get the clothes from there.
Hope this helps someone!
Hire whatever help you can afford for whatever isn’t crucial that you do and save your energy for things that really matter. Don’t compare yourself to other people-even though its not easy. Write lots of lists, use instacart and amazon so you don’t need to walk into stores, use a label maker so people know where things go- even if they never put them there 🙂 Take a deep breath and soon everyone will be grown up! But not before you are totally exhausted!
I have lots of young children walking in the door anytime between 3-6 every day. They usually come in hungry. I find making a big pot of super easy soup and leaving it on the stovetop on a low flame all evening is best. I have something hot available for each child (and husband) when they walk in the door. All the soups I make take less than 10 minutes to prepare and are hearty, filling and low calorie-all around win. If I have leftover at the end of the night-a child can bring it to school for lunch for the next day in a thermos or I can have it the next day too! If I have a little extra time in my day I also like to take out a nice container and either cut up a bowl of fruit or vegetables and put that on the table once the kids start walking in-sometimes I’ll put out chumas as a dip too-again totally nutritious and filling.
Rivky, can you post a few soup recipes? That sounds like a great idea! Thanks
Rivky, can u post some of your soup recipes? That sounds like a great idea! Thanks
poplin, say goodbye to laundry!