The women are the ones busy running in and out of the Sukkah, trying to give more, serve more, to make Yom Tov special for everyone else. But perhaps it’s time for you to just give yourself.

Picture this: You’ve been invited by someone you love to come spend time together.

You arrive at a beautifully set table. The food is delicious, the wine is flowing, everything feels warm and inviting. And just as you’re about to really connect, your host gets up.

Just one more thing from the kitchen.

They come back. You start talking. They remember something else they need to bring out.

Again and again, you almost get to the part you came for, to share what’s been happening, to tell your stories, to hear and be heard, but your loved one is too busy hosting you to actually sit with you.

And eventually you want to say: I don’t need another salad. I need you.

Welcome to Sukkos.

We women put a lot into Yom Tov. The cooking, serving, decorating, clearing, feeding everyone again approximately 17 minutes after they finished eating.

We want the Sukkah to be beautiful. We want the meals to feel special. We want everyone to have what they need. But somewhere between the soup and the second load of dishes, we can forget what all of this is actually for.

The Sukkah is an invitation into Hashem’s space.

Did you know that out of 613 ways to connect with Hashem, only 3 require our entire being? Living in Eretz Yisrael surrounds us on the broadest level. Mikvah is deeply personal and intimate. And somewhere between the two is Sukkah.

We step inside that space with our whole selves.

We eat there. We talk there. We laugh there. We sit surrounded by Hashem’s presence, joined by the Ushpizin and simply spend time together. It may be one of the most intimate invitations of the entire year, and we can spend the whole time bringing out another salad.

So this Sukkos, at least once, just sit. 

Find a few minutes when you’re not carrying a serving bowl. Bring your coffee into the sukkah. Sit down. Look around.

You don’t need to daven. You don’t need to have a profound thought. You don’t even need to do anything.

Because maybe after everything we do to make Sukkos beautiful, Hashem is waiting for the same thing we would be:

I don’t need another salad.

I want you.