Chodesh Elul
Mazel: Besulah (girl)
Human Faculty: Action
Yes, it’s that time of year again: The King is in the field. Rav Dessler famously teaches that our calendar is like a circular train route–every station we stop at is another opportunity to load up on specific spiritual gifts. Now that we’ve stopped at the Elul station, let us take a moment to understand the immense potential of this time of year so we can tap into this gift and b”H leave this station with a fully loaded carriage.
The mazel of Elul is besulah, a young girl. The first time this word appears in the Torah is in praise of our matriarch Rivkah, before her marriage to Yitzchak. As the wife of the one whose koach lay in tefillah, who “went out to the field to converse” with Hashem, Rivkah’s koach lay in tefillah, as well. It is the essence of being in a constant relationship with Hashem through our words, through speaking to Him, through turning to Him with everything.
As Yidden, we are in a relationship with Hashem. If a husband and wife don’t converse with one another, what type of marriage is it? True, they may be technically married to one another, but the element of relationship, of connection, of closeness, of “beloved” is painfully absent. Elul, the acronym, for “am I to my Beloved and my Beloved is to me,” is a time when we want to deepen that relationship. Through what? The act of tefillah, of being in constant conversation. Of course, formal tefillah is a fundamental element in Yiddishkeit. Another fundamental element is informal tefillah—it’s about the easy flow, the personal touch, the frequency. As well, the closer we are to another being, the more our conversation moves from the general to the more specific. We don’t only talk about big topics, but also about the detailed goings-on of our day-to-day life. During this month when the potential for a deepened relationship is immense, this is the way we can experience the sweetness of that kind of union.
Want to tap into the spiritual propensity of this month? Keep up a constant conversation with Hashem.
Here’s how to maximize the potential of this month:
Once per day this month, talk to Hashem about something. Look out for a detail that you want to either thank, praise, or beseech for.
In addition to your general requests or gestures of gratitude (for health, parnassah, or a shidduch) or formal prayers, make this conversation more personal. Discuss a detail you’d never thought of bringing to Hashem, whether you felt it was too petty (like a leaking sink or a parking spot) or too personal.
Enter the territory that makes the relationship more intimate, more real.
Talk it out. Go into detail, in the way you would with someone you feel especially close to. Hash out your concerns, dilemmas, and predicaments. Know that He is listening to every word; He wants to hear it all.
Bask in the relationship, and keep talking. As the month moves on, you’ll notice how this prayer habit cultivates more and more closeness. You’ll find that once you get into the loop of turning to Hashem with anything, you’ll start turning to Him with everything. You’ll be standing at the elevator or in line at the supermarket and find yourself just talking to Him in your mind. And that’s how a relationship happens.
Tefillah, we know, is one of the three ways—along with teshuvah and tzedakah— through which we prepare for the new year. We don’t only deepen our “marriage” with Hashem through prayer; we’re also annulling the frightening decrees for the year up ahead. Here’s another incredible bonus: the more real our kesher with Hashem becomes, the more beloved we feel at all times.
When we engage in constant conversation with Hashem, we come ever closer to Him, deepening our relationship and experiencing the special closeness that Elul invites us to bask in. What a wonderful way to prepare for the new year!
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