Rosh Hashanah Strategies to Unlock the Shefa and Bring the Brachah

7 ways to accomplish what Hashem wants from us this Rosh Hashanah.

As the sun sets on the past year, a sense of awe and trepidation fills our hearts. We know that this is the moment that Hashem passes each of us under His staff and determines our fate for the coming year. It’s frightening yet it’s empowering. We have this opportunity to do our part in making room in our lives for all of the brachos Hashem waits to shower upon us. We think back to a year that had its share of ups and downs, joys and hardships, and we hope with all of our hearts for a coming year with more of those ups and fewer of those downs. And while we know that everything that happens is our destiny, that what we perceive as bad is really the right thing for us, we still hope that we can see the good clearly, and that we merit a year that is both good and sweet. 

Here are a few ways we can do our hishtadlus to help us earn a year full of the bounty and blessing we seek:

Thank Hashem

Before we think about, and ask for, everything we want in the coming year, we need to look back and appreciate everything we received in the past year. If you are reading this, that means you are alive and already have so many things to be thankful for. And though it may have been a difficult year for you, you may have suffered a lot and lost a lot, there are surely many things that went well for you. In order to continue receiving so many gifts, we need to show we are grateful for that which we already have. When you give your grandchild a birthday gift, and neither the child nor his parents reach out to thank you for it, you might think twice before giving a gift the next time. Especially if this happens year after year. Now, Hashem isn’t a human being, chas v’shalom, who craves our acknowledgment and appreciation. We need to thank for our own sake, so that we can appreciate His goodness and so we can become grateful people. 

The more we appreciate, the more Hashem gives us reason to appreciate. Spend some time over Yom Tov going through all that you are grateful for. Go through every part of your body, every one of your five senses, every illness you have been spared from, every facet of your health. Think about every person in your life, family, friends, acquaintances, and mentors. They may be people you never even met but whose shiurim you listen to and have thus been impacted by. Your hobbies, your skills, your material possessions, your spiritual gains. Nature, Torah, mitzvos and every detail therein.  If you have time to do this before Yom Tov you can keep a written list to keep looking back at, but if not, it’s okay. Just keep running through the reel of gratitude in your mind throughout Rosh Hashanah as you plead for continued shefa and even more.

Tikun Hamidos

Hopefully, we’ve had a moment or two during Elul to make a small kabbalah or two, to take this time of self-improvement seriously and show Hashem that we are striving toward greater heights in our avodas Hashem, one tiny step at a time. All of the bounty that we seek—life, health, wealth, happiness, the big things, and the small things are merely tools to help us in our avodas Hashem. We tell Hashem that we want more time in this world to serve Him, we want the means to be able to give to others, and we want the harchavas hada’as that comes in the absence of stress and turmoil so that we can focus on kirvas Elokim. 

When we show Hashem we are serious about our avodas Hashem, we show Him that we are a worthy receptacle for the bounty He has in store for us. The truth is that the amount that Hashem has given us and done for us means that we owe Him so much more than He’ll ever “owe” us. It’s not about earning prizes in this world, because we know we are unworthy, and we plead with Hashem to bless us anyway. We are turning to Hashem and we are begging Him to allow us more opportunities to serve Him by giving us the tools we need in order to be able to do so. And by taking those steps, we are opening ourselves up to the shefa of brachah He is waiting to shower down upon us. 

Crown Hashem

The essence and avodah of today is to be mamlich Hashem as our King. It’s also the day we are judged, but those two go hand in hand. Being mamlich Hashem on a personal level means recognizing that Hashem is the King of all Kings; He is the one who controls everything that goes on in our lives, from the minute to the monumental. It is He who controls the world as a whole as well, every detail of creation moving at His will. When we acknowledge that it all comes from Him, and we are machnia ourselves to recognize our role as His servants above all else, we allow Him to pass on all of the treasures He contains in His royal treasure house. 

Below we talk about tefillah, but the funny thing is, the tefillos of Rosh Hashanah are not as full of bakashos for the new year as we would expect. They are in fact heavily laden with malchus Hashem. Because really, that’s all we need in our lives. When we have Hashem and we recognize His role at the head of our lives, then we have everything we could possibly need and want. 

Tefillah

It seems too obvious to even have to mention, but of course we do. There is nothing that happens, nothing that is gained or received without tefillah. Hashem wants to hear from us because He knows we need that connection that develops when we build a relationship with Him. He therefore created the world in a way that we need to ask for what we want. The roots of this concept are in sheishes yimei bereishes, when the grass was waiting beneath the soil from day three, unable to sprout until Adam was created and able to pray for rain and growth. If we want good and grace and blessings this year, we need to ask for it.  

The entire Rosh Hashanah is built around tefillah, but as women, we don’t always have time to daven as much as we want. That doesn’t mean we have to forgo tefillah altogether. We might find that there are many opportunities to daven. There are the moments that we may not be able to engage in formal tefillah because our family needs us to be available, but we can still talk to Him. We can use our own words to talk to Hashem, either out loud so our little ones can hear and learn what it means to have a conversation with our Father and our King, or to ourselves, so we can pour out all of our heart’s secret desires. There are also times that are quieter when, though we might not be able to launch into an entire Shmoneh Esrei, we can say tefillos that are more easily interrupted, should those yummy little interruptions choose to make themselves needed. And if we truly desire to daven, there are almost always ways to make it happen. Davening mussaf after the seudah, while a husband or older child holds down the fort, maariv at night after the children are in bed, or trading off with a trusted neighbor for a precious tefillah in shul. 

There are tefillos you will automatically say, like bentching, and even the yehi ratzons we traditionally make on Rosh Hashanah nights. You are saying them anyway; all you have to do is infuse them with that extra bit of kavanah, understanding what you are saying and what you are asking for. That focus will turn those words into true bakashos.  It doesn’t matter how you do it, and it’s okay if you don’t get to daven as much as you would like to, but make sure to squeeze in those tefillos. 

We need to daven for everything we want, even that which we already have. Every year we start with a blank slate, and there are no guarantees that just because we’ve had something until now, we will continue to have it in the coming year. We need to ask. To thank, like we mentioned above, and then ask for it to continue. 

Shalom 

“Ein kli machzik brachah ela hashalom,” It’s a guarantee that the more shalom we have in our lives, the more brachah we will receive. Machlokes has the effect of a blockage in a pipe, preventing the flow of brachos from reaching us. It’s always a good time to bring peace in Klal Yisroel, but this is an especially auspicious time, the season of judgment and the season of forgiveness. It’s hard to let go of grudges, especially when we were the one who was wronged, but if we think about all that we need and all the largesse Hashem has at His disposal to grant us, our rift should seem paltry in comparison. 

Aseres Yemei Teshuvah begins with Rosh Hashanah. You may have to wait to do the hard work of asking forgiveness until after Yom Tov, especially if the party you have sparred with is not local. But today you can begin doing the inner work, reminding yourself how important shalom is and reminding yourself of the rewards that await those who give in. You can work on seeing the other person in a more positive light, reminding yourself of their maalos and what you appreciate about them. You can reflect on your own role in the relationship and subsequent altercation. As you are passed beneath Hashem’s Staff, spotlight on you, you can show Him your efforts; you can show Him that you are taking the first steps toward bringing more shalom into your life and into His world. 

Bein Adam L’chaveiro 

There are a few aspects of bein adam l’chaveiro that come into play in our quest for a good and sweet year. We discussed last week how judging our brethren favorably causes us to be judged favorably in Shamayim, so that is an important focus as our judgment hangs over our heads. 

There is also the mantra, the thundering call after U’nesaneh Tokef of “Uteshuvah, utefillah, utzedakah maavirin es ro’a hagezeirah.” Teshuvah and tefillah were covered above, but the tzedakah angle can’t be overlooked. Looking out for the destitute and those in poorer shape than we are is a powerful way to bring us close to the good decrees we are so desperate for. 

And finally, the more we do for Hashem’s children, the more He wants to do for us. If you are a parent, you know how much it means to you to watch your children getting along with each other, being there for each other, and giving to one another. When your child comes to you with a request just after denying their own sibling’s request, it doesn’t help you feel favorably inclined toward filling that request. Like the famous mashal of a patriarch on his deathbed, whose wealthy son came to say goodbye. This wealthy son had continually ignored the pleas of his destitute brother, who had reached out for help numerous times over the years. The elderly father’s parting message to his wealthy son essentially was, “If he’s not your brother, you’re not my son.” Hashem is not like a human parent, but He gave us these human paradigms so that we can draw parallels. We prove ourselves worthy of all that Hashem has to give when we show that we are prepared to give of that bounty, to give of our love and time and care to His children in need. 

Geulah

We can ask Hashem for whatever we want, and there is nothing that is beyond His ability to provide for us. The reality is, though, that there is no such thing as a perfect life in galus. For as long as the world continues as it is, pain is inevitable and loss is inevitable. We are sure to struggle, and that is a hard pill to swallow, even as we know that struggle is good for us and our role in this world. 

The only way to ensure that our year is filled with only pleasant goodness and pure brachah and is devoid of pain and suffering is if we are zoche to the geulah sheleimah. That is why we need to redouble our efforts this year and beg Hashem with all we have to make Tof Shin Pey Hey the year that Mashiach comes and ushers in a world more perfect than we can possibly fathom.

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